💀 Watch Assassin: Killing Watch Snobbery, One Roast at a Time.
Welcome to the only horology channel that doesn't whisper reverently about movements and heritage. We're here to deliver the brutally honest, unfiltered comedy roast of the most revered—and ridiculous—luxury watches on the planet.

We don't just review the watches; we review you.

Join the Watch Assassin as we strap in and take aim at the biggest names in the game: Rolex, Patek Philippe, Audemars Piguet, Cartier, Vacheron, Hublot, Omega and every other waitlist-addicted status symbol in between.

The Roasts: Unflinching comedy focused on a specific brand or model.

Owner Stereotypes: Hilarious (and slightly dark) profiles of the people who actually buy them.

No Pretence: We cut through the marketing B.S. to tell you what's really ticking.

Subscribe now—because your watch might be a masterpiece, but its owner is fair game.