Brawndo News Network

The Thirst Mutilator of News! We bring you the most vital information, corporate sponsorships, and questionable scientific breakthroughs from the year 2505 (and sometimes, eerily, 2025). Featuring your favorite anchors and segments that will definitely leave you saying, "Huh?" Get your daily dose of electrolytes and unparalleled insight right here. Don't be a dumb-ass, subscribe!